#lifehappens – Ramblings put forth

Borrowing Moods From the Sky

I know, I know—one might wonder, “Is she onto something?” or “Why is it never-ending for her?” and whatnot. But today, it’s all about the weather.

Everything was fine: the grey, rumbling clouds; the sudden absence of light. However, things turned when it started pouring.

Haven’t visited a shrink or psychologist yet, but pouring brings the worst out of me. So today’s ramblings are more about my own cluster of thoughts—somewhat aligned, more or less all over the place. Ready to win the race of taking up the most time and space in my wandering brain.

Ever been through a situation where your body starts taking cues from the weather around you? Well, who’s going to beat you at unhinging you if your emotions are in the driver’s seat and not ready to wave a white flag anytime soon?

It’s 4:20 by the clock, and I’m ready to sleep off the day because it’s time to activate autopilot mode and sign off for now.

Au revoir! Always thankful to smell mercies.

The Art of Choosing

You know that state where you end up standing at a crossroads, unable to decide which path should be taken or whether you’re on the “right” one. It is the stage that can either tether you or humble you—the stage where you either become the best version of yourself or slowly fade away like a speck of dust resting atop an ancient tome or relic.

What is strange about a dilemma is that it is not something that occurs only once in a lifetime. It is something that may confront you repeatedly, offering timely reality checks along the way. Isn’t it an oddly rewarding experience, where life never stops teaching you, regardless of whether you are equipped with training wheels or not?

The good thing is that your past self never truly abandons you. Somehow, it finds a way to guide you through the uncertainty and help you emerge from the state of dilemma. And when you do, the next thing you feel is pride—a slightly corny smile, a deep sigh of relief, and a profound sense of appreciation for the journey that brought you there.

Au revoir!
Always grateful for having my own back.

When Silence Grows Heavy

You know the feeling when everything is going smoothly and suddenly your chest starts feeling heavy? Like a heavy stone thrown into a pond? It doesn’t only break the momentum of silence, it also shatters the tranquility of the moments which are about to come.

Now, imagine how would it feel if you are just living your life in peace, you know just doing ‘normal’ stuffs? Minding your life, keeping your nose to yourself, not poking a sleeping bear and all?

And suddenly ‘BAM’, out of nowhere you are surrounded with a sense of foreboding. Now, remember that feeling and how does it make you feel? That feeling of helplessness because you don’t even know what and who is causing you that or are those emotions yours to begin with? Are you projecting or reflecting and what not?

Well, hit a nerve, didn’t it?
Honestly, no one should be going through such kind of emotions because they have already too many things to deal with, for starters. And, even if such things can’t be controlled then, the God should be more helpful or merciful on such people and give them might to tackle such forceful and non avoiding matters. After putting these ramblings into a shape, I can feel my restless mind getting a rest.
Ever the grateful one to all the strangers who have stumbled upon my ramblings.
Au Revoir,
Adios

To Bake Sweet Nothings

“Baking”; sounds lovely, right? Be it sweets, goods or dreams. A process which tests your patience time and again. I wonder, ‘How it would feel from the vantage point of a baker when he/she closes his/her dreamy bakery only to take a long and wishful sigh and put his/her sweet imagination into a pre-heated oven and sit on it to turn that into reality?’

Like a painter fills colours in his plain and bland canvas to make this world a better place to breathe in. Oh! A dash of milk, a handful of powdered sugar and a pinch of moody salt to create a mesmerizing blend of sweet nothings!
Oh! To be a baker; to bake dreams and imagination! To bake a reality and serve it into a wide platter. I ponder at the skill of such magicians who can bring happiness on a child’s face by presenting a truffle cake with a dash of whipped cream.

How I wish to be a baker myself and make a sanctuary for myself and those who need a corner of peace just like I crave.

On Carrying Impossible Things

Dreams”; such a fickle word, isn’t it? Some are meant to be fulfilled and many are submerged in the abyss of nothingness. We are the creatures who get to be the carriers of such flamboyant beings.

Being one of such carriers, I wonder, “Am I doing justice to myself or my dreams?” “Am I supposed to be living like this and let my dreams be dying their own job?” I am a responsible adult in my country, I pay my bills and have my food and dream like everyone around me. However, occasionally a seed of doubt gets sown in the back of my head and it continues to grow with the help of darkness that resides in me.

I work as a feminist educator, facilitator, or whatever this hot so-called feminist society calls it. I’ve been pushed around just so that I can be downplayed by the so-called “powerful dynamic” of this godforsaken society.
I’m a dreamer who wants to fuel others’ dreams to their fulfillment. I’m a woman who wants to dream of a tarnish-free society where every child in the streets would get a roof on his/her head, food in his/her stomach.
But everything comes to a halt at one question: “How?”

How can I reach there?
How can I make my dreams true without breaking others’ dreams?
Neither do I have a huge bank balance nor any building on my father’s name. A dreamer can only understand how time continues to pass but the reality remains constant; his dream.
Now comes the peak moment where the dreamer has to take the initiative to turn it into reality. As the carriers of such beautiful beings, we need to believe in ourselves and let our patience, time, and resources play their roles on this stage of the dramatic world.

And Lo and Behold! We’ve come to another end. Always thankful to you for sticking around and letting your time be consumed by these ramblings. Au revoir!

Time

‘Time and tide wait for no one.’ Hello dear readers and ramblers! Been a while, ain’t it? Feels like an eternity of tapping into the magic of words. Well…. things change. And finally, they change so rapidly that you wouldn’t get even a second to wrap your head around it. One minute, you are managing something and the other your other side of the world crumbles.

Well, look at me; talking like someone who has gone through eternity and still has a story to share. That’s time for you. It teaches you its lesson. Some are for you only and some become tattletale for others. However, the plain outcome is, time makes you wiser. Either by hook or crook. Right at the moment, I’m putting these thoughts down; the other end of my brain is already getting occupied to fill the other pages.

I think time makes you stronger and withered at the same time too. Have you ever wondered that, how a hard edged stone loses its edges and starts to become softer, if it is under the water for a long time. It becomes softer just to adapt itself as its situation demands. The strange irony with us is, we are the softer version of our lifetime in the beginning, but time makes us hardened as it passes away, doesn’t it?

I wonder if it is time to sign off and ponder on something else? So, taking a leave for the time being with a hopeful note of gratitude of sticking around. Try not to be a stranger and let your ramblings find a way back home in the comments.

Au revoir.

Restless: Reeling mind

Been a while since I tried writing.. 11:43 by my watch. It might take longer to post, because I’ve so much to put on this clean slate. But on the other hand, I’m coming all blank. As it is already, my chaotic mind decided to remind me that it is still a living and breathing entity on its own.

I chose this topic to share my opinions because, we all reach there at one or another point in our life; time and time again. Its about to be 26th January and being a Nepali makes you lucky and accepting to everything, doesn’t it? Soon, it will be time to say Goodbye to the year 2080 and welcome 2081.

Each day is slipping through our fingers like sand. Some days we want to hold on to that sand as tight as possible without knowing that we’re actually letting it slip more speedily. Humans are fickle, aren’t they? Its our nature after all. We know everything but acceptance is not welcomed in our life.

And to refute, just so that we can have satisfaction of some moments only to come to the almighty, so that he can guide us better. So, here I am. At the beginning of a new day, with a mind with reeling thoughts. Its exactly as attempting exams. Where we have to choose the most appropriate answer . Where the options are related to each other and nothing seems wrong. However, only one is supposed to be correct.

If only I could be a student one more time.. oh the wistfulness. Alas! I don’t have the ultimate solution of this , i.e., time machine. But, look at the bright side, these precious moments let me welcome a New day with new hopes and rambling about my confusions has soothed my restlessness to some extent.

So, its time to end my ramblings here so that I can bring something better forward pretty soon..

Silence: Craved Peace or Unraveled Conversation With Oneself?

Hello there dear readers and visitors.. Hope its going well with you. Its been a while since I’ve updated something like this here on this site. And believe me, I’m feeling like I am waking up from a long deep sleep. But, I felt like this is something I should definitely ramble about. So, here I am.

‘Silence’.. who doesn’t crave for it in the world full of chaos and cacophony? I do and in hopes of releasing some of those inner noises I came here to ramble. Right now, when I’m sitting near my window letting the nature play its tricks on me and as these few moments of silence are with me, I realised that this is what I was basically craving for. Silence so that my thoughts can speak and come out.

As the title of this blog suggests that how someone takes the silence surrounding them it will become exactly that. So, I think its us from the beginning till the end. Right? Life is such a fickle thing that it keeps making us reach at the crossroads unless we decide for ourselves what to choose. Isn’t it humorous that the answers are within us and we look for them outside. I think its too noisy up here that’s why the out noises are less bothering for us.

So, why not just take a deep breath and close our eyes and let those silent moment decide themselves that what they want to be for us: A source of peace or an inner monologue? Why not trust that little voice which can bring you the eventual peace if you work along with it instead of against it. Just have faith and talk to yourself. The answers are just there. If not at the surface, then they’re deep within you. We all have those two keys, i.e. silence and patience. So, let’s keep trying which key fits in our situation to unlock a better way! Not a bad idea.. I hope so?

Oh! Look at the time it flew just like that. So, with no promises of return but hopes to keep rambling it’s time to take a pause. Au revoir!!

Rain

Hello there dear readers.. How’re you all? Hope you’re doing fine. Its Saturday, so I do hope that its going good for you. Well, let’s get back to the point of the beginning, where I was thinking to not write. More like my lazy self was saying that. But my other half caved in and succumbed in the throes of the bliss known as ‘writing.’ The reason I chose this topic because of its uncomplexity; its raining outside. 18:44 to be exact when I’m penning my thoughts here on the site. I started atleast half an hour ago but, the site kept crashing. I guess the site is enjoying a lazy saturday as well.

My rainy day playlist is on with background music of pitter-patter of rain and its quite relaxing. Except when the clouds create chaos in the sky. However, my mind is living in its own universe. Where the world seems peaceful, less noisy almost serene and fresh. My thoughts need an escape as well. The way its raining outside, the water is pouring down from the sky and making the weather clean. My thoughts are eager to come out so that the previous thoughts can vacate the space for the new ones. Interesting, isn’t it?

Whatever we do, makes us a part of some cycle. Finish-repeat, finish-repeat and so on. Some cycles get broken only to get involved in the newer one. But, that’s life. Pouring of rain and thoughts is just important for cleansing of our inner and outer universe, isn’t it? These ramblings are nothing more than my monologue. I’m just letting them come out in form of words. To wonder more, when our thoughts get the shape of words or later full sensible sentences; they become beautiful for us. Leaving a feeling of a weight being lifted off from the chest. The feeling of being freed from a contraption.

Just like ‘rain’.. the clouds must feel lighter after dumping the water on the earth; only to be part of the cycle of universe. I guess, its time for wrap this verbose here. Time to break the cycle, so that I can enter into new one. So, let’s depart on the genuine note of greatfulness to my readers and viewers who are giving their precious time to read these ramblings. Besides that, an assurance of ‘it’s ok’. It’s ok to let your thoughts pour out once in a while to collect so much more than ‘today’.

Au Revoir! Have a nice week ahead..